The Difference Between Regular Arguments and Real Abuse

Drama between people is a very common occurrence. We can’t get along with everyone in life and there are going to be times where we raise our voices or show some serious discontent with someone or something. Heated moments like this are common everywhere, even in marriages. However, it’s important to be able to differentiate between regular arguments and ones that could lead to abuse or even violence.

What’s emotional abuse

Emotional abusers seek to gain systematic control of their partner’s life. It could start with something innocent, such as wanting to control the family’s budget because of their financial situation. However, it can quickly turn sour as it may lead to the abuser asserting even more control over their partner. This could things like asking for permission before being able to buy anything, or being incredibly upset when you purchase something outside of a strict budget.

Emotional abuse typically stems from a feeling of guilt. For example, an emotional abuser might make their partner feel incredibly guilty for spending money on something that wasn’t agreed on per their budgeting. Eventually, a victim of emotional abuse and control like this might feel like they deserve to be punished for being out of line. Of course, this isn’t the case and is caused by the conditioning of the abuser. These situations are incredibly dangerous and it’s vital that you seek help immediately if you feel like your partner is trying to assert control over your life.

What’s physical abuse?

Physical abuse, in comparison, is a lot easier to spot. It often involves assault and domestic violence, and there are usually signs left behind such as bruising and bleeding. Physical assault is an incredibly concerning situation and it’s vital that you seek help immediately if you are in danger of being abused or assaulted. If you know someone that’s going through a difficult relationship and have seen them with unexplainable bruises, cuts or other damage to their body, you should speak to them as soon as possible and seek help from a legal consultant.

Speaking up about physical abuse can be difficult, but it’s important to have someone to speak to that you trust wholeheartedly. This could be a close friend, a family member or even a therapist that has been suggested by your physician.

What’s a regular argument between a couple?

Regular arguments will typically stem from a squabble or dispute, but it doesn’t really go anywhere beyond airing out frustrations. In fact, many couples can get incredibly loud when it comes to arguments, but as long as there’s no intent or sign of abuse during or after the argument, it’s fine to try and solve the issue.

This is especially true if the intent after the argument is to make things right again. The way a couple communicates after an argument is likely the biggest difference between abuse and a regular argument. If there’s no intention to patch things up or reach an agreement after an argument, then it could eventually lead into abuse.