5 Realities Of Parenthood You Never Saw Coming

Before I write this article, I’d just like to preface the fact that motherhood is awesome. It’s the most rewarding, exciting, scary (in a good way) time of your life and you will never experience a love so pure than the one that you receive from your children. Your babies are going to be the making of you, and there is no denying that. However, deciding to expand your twosome into a threesome and make a baby is probably one of the best and most overwhelming decisions that you could ever make in life. Not only are you choosing to give life, you’re choosing to change your own, and this is a massive deal. The presence of a new baby in your life isn’t just going to be exciting and wonderful. It’s not all going to be baby groups and baby showers. It’s not just going to be you sitting with a hot cup of coffee and magazine while the baby sleeps. Parenthood has many twists and turns and one of the biggest things to look at when you’re pregnant is the realities of being a mother. Being in charge of another person, tending to their needs and ensuring that you listen to every cue is not going to be simple. There are some babies out there that are ‘perfect’. They sleep, eat and poop in a routine. Teething doesn’t affect them, and they hit their milestones that are laid out in all the baby books in the most perfect way. But what if that isn’t your baby?

 

 

The first thing that you need to understand about parenting is that you can read ten, twenty or even thirty books about babies, you can daydream about your future baby and you can plan out a nursery to look beautiful: but your baby doesn’t come with instructions. There is no book in the world that can predict YOUR baby. Books can tell you all about the supposed milestones that they should hit. They can tell you all about the importance of regular weigh-ins and they can dictate the methods of eating and sleeping you should use; even diapering is covered. You can daydream about your baby all you like, but most women think about the baby. They forget to picture themselves WITH the baby, and girl, raising a baby is HARD. They don’t come with a manual, so you’re left to decipher their cries like a code book without a key. Breastfeeding is the most natural thing in the entire world; but no one wants to tell you the reality of feeding around the clock, the constant hunger, the leaking through every spare t-shirt that you have. And hey, you didn’t do any laundry because of the demanding, eight-pound hungry machine you’ve given birth to. It’s tough, to balance life in the house and motherhood. The realities of parenting are far more daunting than the books and the social media cutesy gender reveals, and baby showers like to show you.

 

The realities of parenting are going to differ from person to person, but as a human adult parenting is going to make you think about life in a way that you’ve never seen it. Before you have children, you’re carefree. You think you’re busy (which is laughable now, right?) and your whole world moves in a way that you dictate. It’s awesome; you get to sleep whenever you like, making plans with friends is so easy, because you only have to coordinate yourself and you even get to have a social life whenever you want to have one. Then you decide to have children, and children are unpredictable, difficult and expensive. You’ll find yourself frantically trying to work out how to put a living will together, and you’ll find yourself ordering new health insurance plans online from GoMedigap.com so that you are covered for every eventuality. Children have a knack of making you face your mortality, and the reality of that is panic! You are carefree before they turn up, but when they do they turn your life upside down and remind you very harshly that you are getting older and that you need to live life in the right way to stay with them as long as possible.

 

Before you became a parent, you were likely an expert on the subject. You’d detail how you’d handle a toddler tantrum in the middle of a supermarket. You’d wax lyrical to friends about the fact you’d never let your little ones watch unlimited television; it melts their brains, you see. Then you become a parent yourself, and you realise that picking your battles is important. You also realize that the television makes a very entertaining babysitter for the kids when you REALLY have to pee, and you don’t want to be followed. The reality is parenthood is never going to be what you expected it to be. Each of your children is going to differ from the one before, and they can be the funniest, most innocent little creatures you’ve ever come across. You’re going to marvel at their zest for life and let’s be honest, if we lived our lives as passionately as our children did, we’d all be ten times happier! There are days you’ll want to cry in frustration and days you’ll be open-mouthed with joy and pride at the achievements that your children manage to accomplish. There are some realities of parenthood that you’ll find yourself really relating to once you join the Parent Club, and here they are. How many can you relate to?

 

Attachment.

We don’t mean the type of parenting, here, but the way that children attach themselves to very weird things. Your child may see a snail near a flower, and for the rest of the day all you’ll hear about is Mr Snail and the constant wondering of whether he has a Mrs Snail waiting for him at home, with a bunch of Snail babies. And how does a snail get a shell? Where do snails live? Who made the first snail? Children get weirdly attached to things and they’ll spend weeks wondering about the snail and his life, going crazy with happiness when they spot the snail all over again. It’s things like this that can make you both marvel and go insane as a parent. Marvelling at their imagination and then going nuts at the incessant questions – yep, you’re a parent.

 

Battles.

Children are resilient, beautiful and steadfast – unless they’re yours. Stubborn children can be as headstrong as a CEO of a top company that you are dealing with. Think of them like mini teenagers who cannot yet control their emotions or their wants and needs. They do not NEED to wear a Spiderman costume to the grocery store and you do not want them to. But, picking your battle as a parent is going to be the difference between you getting the groceries peacefully or not. And let’s be honest, they look awesome as Spiderman.

 

Laughter.

One of the biggest realities of parenting is that you’re going to laugh. There will be days where frustration alone has you laughing your head off, because the alternative will be crying. You’ll shush and pat the baby for hours, knowing that when they are fast asleep on your shoulder that it’s not over. You’ll lie them down and boom – wide awake – and you’ll just laugh crazily to yourself, because your baby needs to learn how to sleep before you collapse. Hold yourself up, though. Parenthood is full of moments you will cry laughing instead of just cry; wait for them, they’re so worth it!

 

Cleaning.

An important lesson in parenthood is that your home will never be the same again. Living in a show home is overrated and tidying toys sixty times a day gets old REAL fast. Instead, come up with a routine for your house and stick to it as best you can. Invest in a good baby carrier and wear the baby to free your hands for chores around the home. You may be used to getting the vacuum cleaner out once a week or so. Well, it’s time to upgrade to a handheld because you’re going to be chasing crumbs all day – even when they eat in another room. Children seem to spontaneously spout crumbs and it takes some getting used to!

 

Organization.

Military routines have nothing on what you need to achieve as a parent. Picture dressing the baby and toddler at the same time – it’s like a wrestling match with two octopus! You need to be as organized as possible to manage your children along with your time, and it’s the reason that routine will be present in your life from the moment they are born to their teen years. Being late is not an option anymore and you need to make good changes as early as possible to ensure this doesn’t happen!

 

Being a parent may not be easy, but it’s going to be the best thing that you’ve ever done in your life. Trust me.

 

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